Q: Did you hear her eyes were blue?
A: Yeah, one blew this way, one blew that way...
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Similar jokes
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Q: What did Hitler get for his birthday?
A: An easy bake oven and a GI-Jew.
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How do you blindfold an Asian?
With dental floss!
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Q: How does every black joke start?
A: With the white guy looking over his shoulder.
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A woman is speaking to her friend, ‘My husband has got one foot in the grate.’
‘Don’t you mean one foot in the “grave”?’ says the friend.
‘No,’ replies the woman.
‘He wants to be cremated.’
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Q: What does your Mama and a slinky have in common?
A: They aren't much to look at but you can't help cracking a smile when you see it tumbling down the stairs.
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Since it started to rain, my wife can't stop looking through the window.
If it will start pouring down, I'm afraid I will have to let her inside.
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A ship goes out to sea and crashes.
6 people (1 woman and 5 men) survive and use a safety raft to float to this deserted island.
Well, after spending several weeks on the island, they all begin to get really lonely and sexually deprived.
So they come to this agreement.
All of the men will marry the one woman for a week.
So the first man has her for one week, the second man has her for the second week, and so on.
Everyone will now be getting sex and they all agree to it.
This goes on for five years and everyone is happy.
Each man gets sex every fifth week and the woman gets to have sex whenever she wants with a different man every week.
Well, a few weeks into the fifth year, the woman dies.
The first week is pretty bad, the second week is still pretty bad, the third week is getting worse, the fourth week things are just bad, real bad, and the fifth week is just awful.
It’s getting so very bad that on the sixth week they buried her.
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Q: What do you do when you see a black man with half a face?
A: Stop laughing and reload.
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Late in the night he regained consciousness.
He found himself in agonizing pain in the hospital's ICU, with tubes up his nose, wires monitoring every function and a gorgeous nurse hovering over him.
He realized he'd obviously been in a serious accident.
She gave him a deep look straight into the eyes, and he heard her slowly say, "You may not feel anything from the waist down."
Somehow he managed to mumble in reply, "Can I feel your tits, then?"
That, my friends, is a positive attitude!
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