Why did Hitler committed a suicide? He received the bill from Gazprom.
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There is nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.
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A school in the United States is on fire.
One fireman is throwing the kids through the window, while the other one is standing on the ground and catching them.
After half of an hour the upper fireman asks:
Hey man, why aren't you catching black kids?
Oh damn, I thought these were the burnt ones.
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Don't make 9/11 jokes, my dad died at the twin towers.
The best damn pilot in Saudi Arabia.
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"Excuse me, how do I get to the hospital quickly?"
"Just stand in the middle of the road for a while."
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Me and my wife decided that we don't want to have children anymore.
So anybody who wants one can leave us their phone number and address and we will bring you one.
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How do you make a baby drink?
Stick it in the blender.
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I bet my friend $5 that he would drown in the lake.
A bittersweet victory.
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What's the good part of there being no blacks on the Jetsons?
It means the future will be great!
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Q: Why did Hitler kill himself?
A: He saw his gas bill.
A sadist, a masochist, a murderer, a necrophile, a zoophile and a pyromaniac are all sitting on a bench in a mental institution.
"Let's have sex with a cat?" asked the zoophile.
"Let's have sex with the cat and then torture it," says the sadist.
"Let's have sex with the cat, torture it and then kill it," shouted the murderer.
"Let's have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it and then have sex with it again," said the necrophile.
"Let's have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it, have sex with it again and then burn it," said the pyromaniac.
There was silence, and then the masochist said: "Meow."
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