What do you call a nun in a wheel chair?
Virgin mobile.
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Q: What's the difference between Jesus Christ and a painting of Jesus Christ?
A: It only takes one nail to hang a painting.
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Did you hear that Princess Di was on the radio a couple of weeks ago?
Yep, and on the dashboard, and on the window, and on the hood....
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Q: Why is Al Qaeda more compassionate than pro-lifers?
A: The 9/11 hijackers got to die instantly.
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The judge asks the murderer:
Why did you kill that old lady?
For money..
But you got only 20 cents
Yes, but killing five of them would already make a dollar.
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Anal sex is like your first car - you dont really want it, but your dad gave it to you anyways.
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"Daddy, there is a man at the door. He says he is collecting for the nursing home."
"That's perfect. Tell him grandpa is coming in a moment."
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A single car crash kills a Mexican family.
15 people died.
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What's white and bobs up and down in a baby's crib ?
A Pedophiles ass.
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"My parachute did not work."
Said no one ever.
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Q: How do you make a cat go ‘woof’?
A: Soak it in petrol, and set it on fire.
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