Chuck Norris doesn't smile, his mouth smiles for him.
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Nobody doesn't like Sara Lee.
Except Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a particle accelerator to collide atoms, he just smashes his fists together.
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If you are next to Chuck Norris then you will always have perfect cell phone reception.
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Ghosts are created when Chuck Norris kills people to fast for the grim reaper to prosses.
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Santa Clause doesn't watch you sleep but Chuck Norris does.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have hair on his testicles, because hair does not grow on steel.
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Chuck Norris was supposed to make a cameo appearence in "Full House" but he was let off because he wanted to rename the show "Roundhouse."
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Using only a black king, Chuck Norris defeated the world-champion grand-master in chess.
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Chuck Norris once walked into my house and I was fined for trespassing.
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As an infant, Chuck Norris' parents gave him a toy hammer.
He gave the world Stonehenge.
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