Chuck Norris doesn't smile, his mouth smiles for him.
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Chuck Norris doesn't pick up his food to eat it.
He commands it to enter his mouth.
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Chuck Norris can freeze water using a toaster.
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Chuck Norris roundhoused a guy so hard he starved to death before he stopped sliding.
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Chuck Norris can lie honestly.
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Chuck Norris doesn't bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing.
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Chuck Norris does not open doors.
Tthe doors have the common courtesy to open for him
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Chuck Norris can see at least 3 extra colors.
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Whiteboards are white because Chuck Norris scared them that way.
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Chuck Norris does not skip stones... he skips sheets of drywall.
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Not only CAN Chuck have his cake and eat it too, he WILL.
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