Chuck Norris does not own a house.
He walks into random houses and people move.
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Steve Austin had to be rebuilt as the Six Million Dollar Man after he looked Chuck Norris in the eye, shook his hand and then went weak at the knees.
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Chuck Norris uses a gun to be humane.
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When Clark Kent goes into a phonebooth, Superman comes out.
When Chuck Norris goes into a phone booth, it explodes and Chuck walks away.
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Chuck Norris doesn't shave, his beard grows to the perfect length and stops.
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Chuck Norris CAN get blood from a stone.
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When Chuck Norris eats dinner at a restaurant, the wait staff tips him.
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Mess with Chuck Norris, you get roundhouse kicked.
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Chuck Norris climbed the stairway to heaven, and came back down again.
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When Chuck Norris enters a sauna the sauna starts sweating.
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Chuck Norris can make a rock grow.
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