What's a moo hoo for a tug-of-war between two longhorns?
A bull pull.
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How does an octopus go to war?
Well-armed.
Chuck Norris and Jean-Claude Van Damme play tug a war with live annacondas.
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In World War 2 Chuck Norris Pointed his Fingers at an enemy zero and said BANG, The plane burst into flames and crashed.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?
He felt funny.
The war with Japan would have ended sooner, but the allies decided that dropping Chuck Norris on Hiroshima would be a crime against humanity.
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One day a man goes to a pet shop to buy a parrot.
The assistant takes the man to the parrot section and asks the man to choose one.
The man asks, "How much is the yellow one?"
The assistant says, "$2000."
The man is shocked and asks the assistant why it's so expensive.
The assistant explains, "This parrot is a very special one. He knows typewriting and can type really fast."
"What about the green one?" the man asks.
The assistant says, "He costs $5000 because he knows typewriting and can answer incoming telephone calls and takes notes."
"What about the red one?" the man asks.
The assistant says, "That one's $10,000."
The man says, "What does HE do?"
The assistant says, "I don't know, but the other two call him boss."
Q: Why do Soviet soldiers always miss?
A: They have terrible Marxmanship.
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How would you get four reindeer in a car?
Two in the front and two in the back.
And how do you get four polar bears in a car?
Take the reindeer out first.
Q: What do you call a chilly dog sitting on bunny?
A: A Cold dog on a bun.