They said the baby looked like me. Until they turned him the right way up.
Q: Why did the cat sleep with a fan on? A: He wanted to be a cool cat.
When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.
One day Pepito was having a shower with his father when he saw his fathers penis. He asked his father what it was and his father replied "this is my racing car". The next night Pepito heard moaning in his parents room, being curious he peeped in to see what was happening. He then saw his father on top of his mother, while looking his father saw him and told him to go to his room. "OK, but I'm not sure you're driving that racing car properly" replied Pepito.
Yo momma so ugly that she made all her blind kids cry.
Billy: What a pair of strange socks you're wearing, one is green and the other is blue with red spots!! Drew: Yes, it's really strange. I've got another pair just like that at home.
Q: How did the sand get wet? A: The sea weed!
What's black and white, black and white, and black and white? (A panda bear rolling down a hill!)
Q: What do you call a bunch of black kids playing in a pile of leaves? A: Rasin Brand.
What did the volcano say to the other volcano? Stop erupting me.