The best kids jokes

There was a couple wanted to go out for dinner for their anniversary but they didn’t make it with the babysitter so they had nowhere to leave their little boy! After a lot of talk father came up with an idea! "We will put a vinyl at the pickup deck, something with kid-stories so our little boy will sleep at once and everything will be fine!" "Ok," said the wife. So,that is what they did and went out sure for their plan. After about 2 hours, they arrived back home and listen noise and the boy screaming: "I waaaant,i waaaant,i waaaaant…" They run up to boy’s room and saw the little boy hitting the wall and screaming the same words: "I waaaant!" They wonder about what happened and then they listened to the pickup: "Do you want to listen my story? Do you want to listen my story? Do you want to listen my story?"
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has 53.58 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: anniversary, couple, kids, wife
A couple had been married for 50 years and had raised a brood of 10 children and was blessed with 20 grandchildren. When asked the secret for staying together all that time, the wife replies, "Many years ago we made a promise to each other: the first one to pack up and leave has to take all the kids."
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has 53.30 % from 143 votes. More jokes about: kids, marriage, time
Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A: We have to stick together.
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has 53.25 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: kids
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In a stork?
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has 53.18 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: dirty, kids, stupid
At a Whitehouse party for past presidents. Michelle Obama caught Barron Trump making faces at Sasha. Michelle walked over to reprimand the child and said, "Barron, when I was a little girl, I was told if that I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that." Baron looked up and replied, "Well, Ms. Obama, you can't say you weren't warned."
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has 53.18 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: kids, mean, political, ugly, women
John: How old are you? Peter: Hmmm..I'm 7 John: You know what, when I was your age, I was also 7.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: age, kids
Chuck Norris once gave a box of his old watches to a group of kids. These kids are now known as the power rangers.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, kids
The tax advisor had just read the story of Cinderella to his four-year-old daughter for the first time. The little girl was fascinated by the story, especially the part where the pumpkin turns into a golden coach. Suddenly she piped up, "Daddy, when the pumpkin turned into a golden coach, would that be classed as income or a long-term capital gain?"
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: kids, tax
Q: Why couldn't the witch have children? A: Her husband had a hallow weenie.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: Halloween, husband, kids
Q: What did the pedophile say when he was released from prison? A: "I feel like a kid again."
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has 52.55 % from 104 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, kids, prison
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