The best kids jokes

What has ten letters and starts with gas? An automobile.
has 50.45 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: kids
The father with his daughter are taking a walk to a public place of their town; "Ann! Why are you so nervously looking around?" observes the father. "How else can I find you a really good son in law, dad?"
has 50.29 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: dad, kids, lawyer
How did the Vikings send secret messages? By norse code! Why did the knight run about shouting for a tin opneder? He had a bee in his suit of armour! Teacher: Who can tell me where Hadrians Wall is? Pupil: I expect it’s around Hadrian’s garden miss! Why were the early days of history called the dark ages? Because there were so many knights!
has 50.29 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: history, kids
My kids get along great when they're sleeping.
has 49.93 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: kids
Q: How are rape and an airplane similar? A: The ride gets more annoying when the kid starts screaming.
has 49.79 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: airplane, dirty, kids, travel
"Jeff, my child, your mother had to stay in the hospital for a few days, cause the stork that brought your baby brother bite her by accident." "Oh, gosh! What a terrible thing to happen to her after such a difficult birth!"
has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: baby, hospital, kids
Light was heard saying to his son, "Keep practicing and one day you will be faster than the speed of Usain."
has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: athlete, kids
First boy: "Are you having a party for your birthday?" Second boy: "No, I'm having a witch do." First boy: "What's a witch do?" Second boy: "She flies around on a broomstick casting spells."
has 49.00 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: birthday, kids, party
There was a baby born in the hospital and he weighed ten pounds. The odd thing about him was his body weighed five pounds and his balls weighed five pounds. All the nurses and even the doctor didn't know what to do with him. Then, the chief surgeon walked in and asked what was wrong. The head nurse replied, ''We don't know what to do with this baby.'' So the chief surgeon took one look and said, "You should put him into a mental institution." ''Why?' asked the head nurse. "Well," replied the chief surgeon, "take a look at him. The boy is obviously half nuts."
has 48.78 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: kids
A wife to her husband as they watch their young son playing: "He's such a sensitive child. Let's wait until he's older before we tell him you're an accountant."
has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: accountant, age, husband, kids, wife
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