The best kids jokes

What is the difference between a fridge and a kid? A fridge doesn't shout when you put your meat inside it.
Vote: has 31.08 % from 53 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, disgusting, kids
Why do bears have fur coats? (Because they look silly wearing jackets!)
Vote: has 31.06 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

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He was such a big baby that the doctor was afraid to slap him.
Vote: has 31.03 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What does a nosey pepper do? A: Gets jalapeno business!
Vote: has 30.11 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: business, kids
Q: What did the big turnip say to the little turnip A: When did you turn up?
Vote: has 30.11 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

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If a wizard was knocked out by Dracula in a fight what would he be? Out for the count!
Vote: has 29.93 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

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How do teddy bears keep their den cool in summer? (They use bear conditioning!)
Vote: has 29.93 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

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There once was two people Lisa and Brian They got married and had a child. The only problem was that the child was only a head, he had no arms, legs or torso. So all his life he was picked on and teased and he always wished he had a body. So when he turned 21 his dad took him to a bar and let him have his first beer ever. When he drank a whole bottle an arm popped out. When he drank more bottles more body parts popped out. After drinking many beers he finally had a whole body. As they left the bar, he was very drunk and was hit by a bus and he died. The moral of the story "Quit while you're a head."
Vote: has 29.01 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, bar, kids, life, marriage
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
Vote: has 29.01 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids
Q:How does a bear start a race? A: READY, TEDDY, GO!
Vote: has 28.62 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids