The best kids jokes

Q: How is spinach like anal sex? A: Chances are if you're forced to have it as a child you are probably going to hate it as an adult.
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has 43.73 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: age, black humor, food, kids, sex
The moon is just a football Chuck Norris kicked up when he was a kid.
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has 43.61 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, football, kids
Most babies born today are very young.
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has 43.52 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: kids
At a Whitehouse party for past presidents. Michelle Obama caught Barron Trump making faces at Sasha. Michelle walked over to reprimand the child and said, "Barron, when I was a little girl, I was told if that I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that." Baron looked up and replied, "Well, Ms. Obama, you can't say you weren't warned."
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has 43.39 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: kids, mean, political, ugly, women
A man is driving his five year old to a friend’s house when another car races in front and cuts them off, nearly causing an accident. "Douchebag!" the father yells. A moment later he realizes the indiscretion, pulls over, and turns to face his son. "Your father just said a bad word," he says. "I was angry at that driver, but that was no excuse for what I said. It was wrong. But just because I said it, it doesn’t make it right, and I don’t ever want to hear you saying it. Is that clear?" His son looks at him and says: "Too late, douchebag."
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has 42.53 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: car, dad, driving, kids
When Chuck Norris was a kid his parents took him to a beach in Georgia. While swimming Chuck Norris pants came down and out popped Florida.
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has 42.25 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, kids
Yo' Mama is so stupid, she gave your kids a "Yo' Grandmama Is So Stupid" joke book.
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has 42.25 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: insulting, kids, stupid, Yo mama
A mother found out she was pregnant and told the good news to anyone who would listen. One day when mother and son were shopping, a woman asked the little boy if he was excited about the new baby. ‘Yes!’ the four-year-old said. ‘And I know what we are going to name it, too. If it's a girl we're going to call her Mary, and if it's another boy we're going to call it quits!'
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has 42.03 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: kids
Q: What bounces and makes kids cry? A: My donation cheque to Children in Need.
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has 42.03 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: kids, life
Q: How did the sand get wet? A: The sea weed!
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has 41.89 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: kids, weed
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