First boy: "Are you having a party for your birthday?"
Second boy: "No, I'm having a witch do."
First boy: "What's a witch do?"
Second boy: "She flies around on a broomstick casting spells."
The housewife answered a knock on the door and found a total stranger standing on the doorstep.
"Excuse me for disturbing you, ma'am," he said politely, "but I pass your house every morning on my way to work, and I've noticed that every day you appear to be hitting your son on the head with a loaf of bread."
"That's right."
"Every day you hit him on the head with a loaf of bread, and yet this morning you were beating him with a chocolate cake."
"Well, today is his birthday."
Little girl: "Why does your son say, 'Cluck, cluck, cluck?'"
Mother: "Because he thinks he's a chicken."
Little girl: "Why don't you tell him he's not a chicken?"
Mother: "Because we need the eggs."
What did the volcano say to the other volcano?
Stop erupting me.
They said the baby looked like me.
Until they turned him the right way up.
When Chuck Norris was a kid his parents took him to a beach in Georgia.
While swimming Chuck Norris pants came down and out popped Florida.
Vote:
Q: What is the best way to keep dogs out of the street?
A: Put them in a barking lot.
An Arabic kid joined my football team.
All he did was blow the plays.
Q: Why did the cat sleep with a fan on?
A: He wanted to be a cool cat.
Did you hear about the baby who swallowed a pin?
It was OK.
It was a safety pin.