The best jokes about life

A man asked for a meal in a restaurant. The waiter brought the food and put it on the table. After a moment, the man called the waiter and said: "Waiter! Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" "Please don't speak so loudly, sir," said the waiter, "or everyone will want one."
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has 73.89 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: life
Q:How do crazy people go through the forest? A:They take the psycho path.
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has 73.89 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: life
There once was a gal named Lewinsky, Who played music like a Stravinsky. "Twas "Hail to the Chief" On this flute made of beef. That stole the front page from Kaczynski. Said Bill Clinton to young Ms. Lewinsky, "We don't want to leave clues like Kaczynski. Since you look such a mess, Use the hem of your dress And wipe that goo off of your chinsky." Lewinsky and Clinton have shown. What Kaczynski must surely have known: That an intern is better. Than a bomb in a letter. Given the choice of how to be blown.
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has 73.89 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: life, music
A tourist was watching an Indigenous man sending smoke signals. Everything around him was primitive, except of a latest model fire extinguisher. "What's the fire extinguisher for?" the tourist wondered. "It's for erasing the misspellings!"
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has 73.89 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: life
You're living, you occupy space, and you have mass. You know what that means? You Matter.
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has 73.80 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: life
Could you imagine if God turns out to be a woman ? Not only am I going to hell, but I will never know why.
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has 73.56 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: god, life, women
Girl: What if a boy hugs me? Mom: Say Don't Girl: What if he kisses me? Mom: Say stop. The next day when the girl goes to school her boyfriend hugs and kisses her well so she says as her mother told her to do and she quickly said DON'T STOP!...
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has 73.53 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: life, school
I used to play tennis, baseball, basketball and chess, but I stopped after my son broke my playstation.
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has 73.53 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: life, sport, technology
Cletus Cletus goes to work and sees that one of his co-workers has a thermos. He asks him what it does and the fellow co-worker responds, "It keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold." Cletus was amazed and when he got home immediately went out and bought one. The next day he goes to work and is proud that he has this wonderful object. The same co-worker realizes he has a thermos and says, "What do you have in it?" He says, "Soup and ice cream!"
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has 73.53 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: food, life, work
One day, Bush was talking with Osama Binladen on the phone, they couldn’t trace from where the call was coming from, but Osama said, "I’ve got good news and bad news." Bush replied, "What’s the good news?" "I’m turning myself in," said Osama. "But the bad news is, I’m coming on a plane."
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has 73.52 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: life
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