The best jokes about life

Why is there a fence around the cemetery? Because people are dying to get in.
Vote:
has 73.94 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: life
A girl walks into a grocery store and asks the stock boy if he has any nuts. The guy says, "No, ma'am." She says, "Well, do you have any dates?" And he says, "Ma'am, if I don't have nuts, do you really expect me to have dates?"
Vote:
has 73.90 % from 78 votes. More jokes about: dating, life
A tourist was watching an Indigenous man sending smoke signals. Everything around him was primitive, except of a latest model fire extinguisher. "What's the fire extinguisher for?" the tourist wondered. "It's for erasing the misspellings!"
Vote:
has 73.89 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: life
A couple was touring the capitol in Washington, DC, and the guide pointed out a tall, benevolent gentleman as the congressional chaplain. The lady asked, "What does the chaplain do? Does he pray for the Senate or House?" The guide answered, "No, he gets up, looks at both houses of Congress, then prays for the country!"
Vote:
has 73.89 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: couple, life, travel
A man asked for a meal in a restaurant. The waiter brought the food and put it on the table. After a moment, the man called the waiter and said: "Waiter! Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" "Please don't speak so loudly, sir," said the waiter, "or everyone will want one."
Vote:
has 73.89 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: life
Q:How do crazy people go through the forest? A:They take the psycho path.
Vote:
has 73.89 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: life
Get to know your mate. If there's something you need to know about him, just ask him right up front. And choose the right moment because the fellas don't like opening up. Like, after intimacy, turn around, look him in his eye and say, "I've been wanting to know, what's your name?"
Vote:
has 73.89 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: life
Back in my day, we didn't watch TV while we ate dinner. We actually talked to each other. It was awful!
Vote:
has 73.80 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: food, life, technology
I am often asked, "Is google a man or a women?" My simple answer is: It's a woman because it won't let you finish your sentence without making a suggestion.
Vote:
has 73.80 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: internet, life
I couldn't understand why it hurts a lot when you bite your tongue accidentally, but it doesn't hurt when you bite it intentionally, and what I couldn't understand most is why you're biting your tongue right now?!
Vote:
has 73.68 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: life
<<<27282930
More jokes →
Page 27 of 82.