Too stupid to understand science? Try religion!
Q: Who hangs out with musicians but isn't a musician? A: Drummers.
A man walks into the doctors and the doctor says, "I've not seen you for a while." The man replies, "Yes, I've been ill."
My son asked me today, "Dad, what music did you like growing up?" "Led Zeppelin," I replied. "Who?" he said. "Yeah, I liked them too."
Knock knock. Who's there? Déja. Déja who? Knock knock.
I got 99 problems and being upside down ain't one. Ok wait I got 66 problems.
Sometimes, during the movie previews, I'll turn to the stranger sitting next to me and whisper, "We should really go see that together."
Chuck Norris has only used the 'Total Gym' twice in his life. When his eyes are open - and when they are closed.
Always be yourself, unless you can be Chuck Norris, then always be Chuck Norris.
Do you know the joke of "no me neither"? No. Me neither.