How long does it take a Mexican to build a, holy shit they're done!
What is height of Fashion? Dhoti with a zip.
Doctor: "I'm sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live." Patient: "What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!" Doctor: "Nine."
A patient: "Doctor, I don’t feel hungry after taking meal." Doctor: "Really, your condition is very serious. Wait a bit." (After sometime, the doctor holds out some medicines). Doctor: "Take these pills. You take one pill after your sleep and another one before you get-up."
What did Mariah Carey really wanted to sing: "All I want for Christmas is you... to get hit by a reindeer."
"I'm sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing. Except at a funeral.
Diplomacy is the art of sending someone to hell in the way that they are looking forward to it.
Always be yourself, unless you can be Chuck Norris, then always be Chuck Norris.
Bruce Lee didn't die from an allergic reaction. He died cause Chuck Norris decided to not let him live anymore.
Q: What do you call a frog who wants to be a cowboy? A: Hoppalong Cassidy.