The best love jokes

Once upon a time, my wife and I were in the local restaurant. We have talked to each other, but after a while, I have become quiet and then I started to talk, I have said: "you know, I love you so much, I will never leave you, never, ever, every single day I think only of you, we will be always together." My wife has asked me: "Oh, darling, these words were addressed to me?" I have said only: "Oh, no, sorry, darling, this time I am talking to this bottle of beer."
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has 63.17 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: beer, communication, food, love, marriage
Q: Why do hipsters love ice? A: Because ice was water before it was cool.
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: hipster, love, winter
Q: Why do walruses love a tupperware party? A: They're always on the lookout for a tight seal.
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has 61.71 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: dirty, love, party
There was once a puppy called May who loved to pick quarrels with animals who were bigger than she was. One day she argued with a lion. The next day was the first of June. Why? Because that was the end of May!
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has 61.01 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: animal, love, time
A teenager is a hopeless romantic who never falls in love more then twice a week.
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has 60.69 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: love, romantic, teen, time
Son: "What's love juice daddy?" Me: "It's what 2 people make when they're having exciting sex. Anyway? What are you watching?" Son: "Wimbledon."
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has 60.66 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: dad, love, sex, sport
Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm in love but not with you... When we broke up you thought I cried But all it was... Was another guy, You told your friends that I was a trick, I told mine that you had a weak dick... I said I loved you And you thought it was true, But guess what baby?! You got played too!
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has 60.20 % from 109 votes. More jokes about: dirty, insulting, love, mean, poems
What’s the difference between a sex night with the husband and one with the truelove? About a half an hour...
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has 60.02 % from 114 votes. More jokes about: husband, love, sex
A woman meets with her lover, who is also her husband's best friend. They make love for hours. Afterwards, as they lie in bed, the phone rings. Since it's the woman's house, she picks up the receiver. The best friend listens, only hearing her side of the conversation: "Hello? Oh, hi... I'm so glad that you called... Really? That's wonderful... Well, I'm happy to hear you're having such a great time... Oh, that sounds terrific... Love you, too. OK. Bye-bye." She hangs up the telephone and her lover asks, "Who was that?" "Oh," she replies, "That was my husband telling me about the wonderful time he's having on his fishing trip with you."
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has 59.88 % from 97 votes. More jokes about: fish, husband, love, marriage, women
Tow millipedes went for honey moon. The male one asked: "My darling, between which feet is your pussy, please?"
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has 59.04 % from 103 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, love, sex, wedding
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