Love is one way to get to a persons heart the other is Chuck Norris' fists.
"For love on the first sight, there's a tremendous medicine!" "What medicine?" "To get another look...!"
A teenager is a hopeless romantic who never falls in love more then twice a week.
How to Impress a Woman: compliment her, kiss her, caress her, love her, comfort her, protect her, hold her, spend money on her, wine & dine her, listen to her, stand by her, support her, go to the ends of the earth for her. How to Impress a Man: show up naked, bring beer.
Tow millipedes went for honey moon. The male one asked: "My darling, between which feet is your pussy, please?"
I'm going to watch my wedding video later "backwards". I love the end bit when she takes the ring off, goes back down the aisle and jumps in the car.
Without you I can't breath. I love you so much my nose.
Happy Father's Day to someone who knew long before me that all the boys I brought home were jerks.
Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm in love but not with you... When we broke up you thought I cried But all it was... Was another guy, You told your friends that I was a trick, I told mine that you had a weak dick... I said I loved you And you thought it was true, But guess what baby?! You got played too!
Son: "What's love juice daddy?" Me: "It's what 2 people make when they're having exciting sex. Anyway? What are you watching?" Son: "Wimbledon."