The best love jokes

Three women were in a bar talking about their husbands and how they made love. The first woman said, “My husband is a psychologist, and before we make love, he brings me flowers and candy. I like that.” The second woman proclaimed, “My husband is a mechanic, he makes love a little rough, but really tunes my engine; I like that!” The third woman replied, “Well my husband works for Microsoft and all he does is sit on the edge of the bed and tell me how good it’s going to be, when I finally get it…”
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has 66.46 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, computer, husband, love
How to Impress a Woman: compliment her, kiss her, caress her, love her, comfort her, protect her, hold her, spend money on her, wine & dine her, listen to her, stand by her, support her, go to the ends of the earth for her. How to Impress a Man: show up naked, bring beer.
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has 65.42 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: beer, love, men, romantic, women
Husband: "When I die, I'd like to die making love." Wife: "At least we know it'll be quick!"
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has 65.08 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: death, husband, love, sex, wife
Q: "What is the difference between like and love?" A: "Spit and swallow."
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has 64.23 % from 274 votes. More jokes about: dirty, love, sex
My girlfriend told me that will change me. I thought she was referring to the character, but she found a new boyfriend!
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has 64.17 % from 78 votes. More jokes about: communication, couple, love, relationship, single
I'm going to watch my wedding video later "backwards". I love the end bit when she takes the ring off, goes back down the aisle and jumps in the car.
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has 64.07 % from 341 votes. More jokes about: car, love, marriage, wedding
A man says to his wife, "I fancy kinky sex, how about I blow my load in your ear?" The wife hastily replies, "No, I might go deaf!" To which the man replies, "I've been shooting my love wads in your mouth for the last 20 years and you're still fucking talking aren't you?"
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has 62.96 % from 174 votes. More jokes about: dirty, love, sex, wife
"I'll never find the right guy," I heard the young guest at the wedding shower sigh. "Don't give up," urged an older woman. "Every pot has a lid." "Or," a cynical voice behind her offered, "you could just be a skillet."
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has 62.88 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: age, love, mean, wedding
Q: Why did the gay guy think his lover was cheating on him? A: He came home shit faced.
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has 62.43 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, gay, love
Q: Why do walruses love a tupperware party? A: They're always on the lookout for a tight seal.
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has 61.59 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: dirty, love, party