The best management jokes

John: "Hey can I borrow some money? I'm broke." Michael: "Get money from your job." John: "I got fired." Michael: "Why?" John: "My boss told me to leave all my problems behind the door, so I told him to stand outside." Michael: "This is why we are friends."
has 64.72 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: friendship, life, management, money, work
Just had an argument with the manager in McDonald's. What a clown!
has 64.28 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: communication, management
Gilding the lily is a job seeker's birthright. Here are a few doozies, where the applicant claimed: - to be a former CEO of the company to which he was applying. - to be fluent in two languages—one of which was pig Latin. - to be a Nobel Prize winner. - to have worked in a jail when he was really in there serving time. - he was fired "on accident."
has 64.23 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: communication, management, prison, stupid, work
A well known TV Evangelists is booking into a posh hotel. He tells the duty manager, "I hope the porn channel is set to disabled" The manager looks at him and replies, "No, it's regular porn, you sick bastard!"
has 62.91 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: dirty, holiday, management, religious
My boss is in the process of filling an open manager position. I asked him to please hire a man because women are crazy. He agreed with me. I got upset that he agreed. I'm pretty sure I unintentionally proved my point.
has 61.63 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: communication, management, mean, women, work
Three fans were bemoaning the sorry state of their football team. "I blame the general manager," said the first fan. "If he signed better players, we'd be a great team." "I blame the players," said the 
second fan. "If they made more of 
an effort, we'd score some points." "I blame my parents," said the third. "If I'd been born in Seattle, 
I'd be supporting a decent team."
has 61.39 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: family, football, geography, management, sport
A 21-year-old is hired by a hardware store. He shows up for his first day of work at 8 AM sharp. The boss welcomes him, then hands him a broom. "First, sweep out the store. Then I'll show you where the window cleaning equipment is." "Sir," the young man protests. "You can't be serious. I'm a college graduate." "Oh, sorry," says the manager, pointing to the broom. "No problem. I can show you how that thing works."
has 60.56 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: graduation, insulting, management, work
Q: Why do Soviet soldiers always miss? A: They have terrible Marxmanship.
has 59.74 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: ethnic, management, war
Mission Statement: A long awkward sentence that demonstrates management's inability to think clearly.
has 58.51 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: communication, management, stupid
A guy went to an electric shop and said: "By a lot of excuse, do you mind me to buy a lamp please?" A manager said: "It isn't necessarily so much apologizes for buying a lamp." The guy said: "Sorry I wanted for installing it in WC."
has 56.55 % from 89 votes. More jokes about: customer service, dirty, management
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