My friend thinks that onion is the only fruit that can make us cry.
So I just threw the coconut up to his head, he cried then.
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Q: What has 12 arms, 12 legs, and 12 eyes?
A: 12 pirates.
Parents: "Why are you welcoming guests in your underwear? "
Me: "Hated me to take off my underwear."
"I'll never find the right guy," I heard the young guest at the wedding shower sigh.
"Don't give up," urged an older woman. "Every pot has a lid."
"Or," a cynical voice behind her offered, "you could just be a skillet."
Your families are extremely proud of you.
You can't imagine the sense of relief they are experiencing.
This would be a most opportune time to ask for money.
I was taking a golf lesson at the range one day trying to improve my game.
This old pro was sitting there giving the lesson and after every swing, he said: "your standing too close the ball".
So I adjusted my stance and took another swing.
Again the golf pro looked up from his seat and said the Same thing "you are too close to the ball."
So I stepped back a little more and swung.
This went on for another six swings with the same advice and finally, out of exasperation I screamed what the hell are you talking about!
The old pro said, "no no, you are too close to the ball after you hit it".
Q: What did the little black kid get for Christmas?
A: My bike.
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I am currently out of the office at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position.
Please be prepared for my mood.
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Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive.
I will be unable to delete all the emails you send me until I return from vacation.
Please be patient, and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.