The best mean jokes

A customer walked into our store looking for Christmas lights. I showed her our top brand, but, wanting to make sure each bulb worked, she asked me to take them out of the box and plug them in. I did, and each one lit up. "Great," she said. I carefully placed the string of lights back in the box. But as I handed them to her, she looked alarmed. "I don't want this box," she said abruptly. "It's been opened."
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has 66.77 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, customer service, mean, technology
Bertie comes sadly to his mommy and says, "Mom, the kids have been mean to me. They keep teasing me that my feet are too big. Please tell me honestly. Are my feet to big?" "Of course not, Bertie. Now go put your shoes in the garage, the dinner is ready."
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has 66.60 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: kids, mean, ugly
Not the people who posted this sign at a bookstore that was going out of business: "Sorry, no public restroom. Try amazon.com."
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has 66.60 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: business, customer service, mean
Sorry, I'm late. I was trying to think of ways to get out of this.
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has 66.46 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: mean
Parents: "Why are you welcoming guests in your underwear? " Me: "Hated me to take off my underwear."
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has 66.46 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: mean
Q: VWhy didn't the fixed dog cross the road? A: Because he didn't have the balls to do it.
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has 66.46 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: dog, mean
A waiter walks up to a table of old ladies eating their lunch and asks, "Is anything OK?"
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has 65.80 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service, food, mean, old people
Husband: "Shall we try a different position tonight?" Wife: "That's a good idea... you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart."
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has 65.30 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: communication, fart, marriage, mean, sex
My friend thinks that onion is the only fruit that can make us cry. So I just threw the coconut up to his head, he cried then.
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has 65.30 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: communication, food, friendship, mean
Q: What's the worst part about sex? A: When they wake up!
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has 65.19 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: mean, sex
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