The best mean jokes

Q: What has 12 arms, 12 legs, and 12 eyes? A: 12 pirates.
Vote:
has 63.61 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: mean, pirate
I was taking a golf lesson at the range one day trying to improve my game. This old pro was sitting there giving the lesson and after every swing, he said: "your standing too close the ball". So I adjusted my stance and took another swing. Again the golf pro looked up from his seat and said the Same thing "you are too close to the ball." So I stepped back a little more and swung. This went on for another six swings with the same advice and finally, out of exasperation I screamed what the hell are you talking about! The old pro said, "no no, you are too close to the ball after you hit it".
Vote:
has 62.50 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: communication, game, golf, mean, time
How come there aren't that many jokes about Jim Jones? The punchlines are too long.
Vote:
has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, mean
Q: What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover? A: The location of the dirtbag.
Vote:
has 61.94 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: insulting, mean
Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive.
Vote:
has 61.89 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: baby, fat, mean, single, time
Little Lucy met Little Johnny after school and ask him, "Johnny do you you think I'm cute?" Little Johnny looked at her from head to toe irritably and replied. "Roses are red. Your blood is too. You look like a monkey. And belong in a zoo. Do not worry, I'll be there too. Not in the cage, But laughing at you".
Vote:
has 61.75 % from 105 votes. More jokes about: beauty, kids, little Johnny, mean, poems
"Wow, look at that! Isn't it beautiful? Let's destroy it." -People
Vote:
has 61.71 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: mean, war
My boss is in the process of filling an open manager position. I asked him to please hire a man because women are crazy. He agreed with me. I got upset that he agreed. I'm pretty sure I unintentionally proved my point.
Vote:
has 61.63 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: communication, management, mean, women, work
I am currently out of the office at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Please be prepared for my mood.
Vote:
has 61.63 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, office, work
Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute? A: Clothes.
Vote:
has 61.43 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: dirty, insulting, lawyer, mean, sex
<<<15161718
More jokes →
Page 15 of 22.