The best mean jokes

Q: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? A: A teacher.
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has 49.86 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, school, teacher
One day a family is wondering what to cook for dinner. They have many ideas but each idea doesn't sound good. Eventually, they go to the living room to watch tv when all of a sudden a knock at the door. The mother answers it and it's a nun saying she's going door to door giving out soup to families. She takes the bag of soup and thanks to the nun. They all go to the kitchen and grab a bowl and then pour the soup into bowls. The father says "this soup stinks!" The mother says "honey a nun brought it to us be grateful." The father then tastes it and says "ew it tastes like shit" and the mother say s "honey just keep eating." After they finish they go to the living room and the news is on. The reporter says "the man dressed as a nun delivering raw sewage door to door has been caught" they all puked.
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has 49.54 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: family, food, mean, religious, vulgar
A man has visited a fortune teller because he wanted to know his future. The fortune teller has taken a look at him from his head to his toes and has said: "you will be not rich because you have a very small ass and with such an ass it is not possible to sit on two seats."
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has 48.78 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: mean, money, time, vulgar, work
KFC in Asia? Korean fried cat.
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has 48.41 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: black humor, cat, food, mean
There are a hundred holes in the body of a woman; one of them would be filled with a penis and 99 others could be filled with money.
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has 47.87 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: dirty, mean, money, sex, women
Q: What did I do in the bed last night. A: Your mom.
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has 47.79 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: dirty, mean, sex
The wild and mean bear grabs the hedgehog and asks him: "Were you at the fox’s party as well?" "Yes, I was. So what?" "Were you sitting on the table?" "Yeah, why?" The bear, ready to leg press him, changes his mind and says to the hedgehog: "Next time, wherever you go, take an umbrella with you!" "But why, my friend?" the hedgehog wonders. "Cause all night long, I was taking thorns off my ass!"
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has 47.72 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: animal, mean, party
Yo mama so ugly that the football team yelled at her to get out of the bus.
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has 47.62 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: communication, football, mean, ugly, Yo mama
Little Johnny's brother, Little Jimmy, was in the toilet throwing Johnny's toys in the toilet. Johnny saw his brother doing this and yelled "JIMMY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" His brother replied "Next time you'll think twice before you don't let me play with you." Little Jimmy threw a toy car in the toilet and said "Bye bye, racecars!" Little Johnny stuck little Jimmy head in the toilet saying "Bye bye brother!"
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has 46.88 % from 94 votes. More jokes about: family, game, kids, little Johnny, mean
A man asks his buddy: "Listen to me! Why has your wife left you, if I may ask?" And he says, "you know, she has told me that I am weak in the bed." "Oh, that is really sad. And what do you do to improve it?" And he says again: "you know, I have bought one book, the name of this book is Kamasutra, you know I am helping myself with the hand, I have learned all positions, but the last position I am not gonna make." "And what is the name of this position?" "You know, imagine the missionary position."
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has 46.76 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: friendship, marriage, mean, sex, stupid
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