The best mean jokes

A rabbi and a priest crash into each other at a four-way junction. They both get out of their cars and look at the wreck. They both thank God they are OK, and the priest says, ‘This must be a sign that God wanted us to meet.’ The rabbi says, ‘Yes, indeed, let’s drink.’ So the rabbi gets out some wine. They toast each other and the priest drinks his glass. But the rabbi doesn’t take a taste of his drink. Priest: ‘Why aren’t you drinking?’ Rabbi: ‘I’m waiting for the police.’
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has 53.18 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: cop, mean, priest, vulgar, wine
One day a family is wondering what to cook for dinner. They have many ideas but each idea doesn't sound good. Eventually, they go to the living room to watch tv when all of a sudden a knock at the door. The mother answers it and it's a nun saying she's going door to door giving out soup to families. She takes the bag of soup and thanks to the nun. They all go to the kitchen and grab a bowl and then pour the soup into bowls. The father says "this soup stinks!" The mother says "honey a nun brought it to us be grateful." The father then tastes it and says "ew it tastes like shit" and the mother say s "honey just keep eating." After they finish they go to the living room and the news is on. The reporter says "the man dressed as a nun delivering raw sewage door to door has been caught" they all puked.
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has 52.50 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: family, food, mean, religious, vulgar
They say that if I don't support transgender rights I'm on the wrong side of history. At least I'm on the right side of the firing squad.
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has 52.50 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: black humor, history, mean, women
Yo mama's so stupid when she cries for help she says "come here please".
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has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, stupid, Yo mama
Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first 10 words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.
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has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, money, technology, work
The wild and mean bear grabs the hedgehog and asks him: "Were you at the fox’s party as well?" "Yes, I was. So what?" "Were you sitting on the table?" "Yeah, why?" The bear, ready to leg press him, changes his mind and says to the hedgehog: "Next time, wherever you go, take an umbrella with you!" "But why, my friend?" the hedgehog wonders. "Cause all night long, I was taking thorns off my ass!"
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has 51.13 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: animal, mean, party
Yo mama so ugly that the football team yelled at her to get out of the bus.
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has 50.70 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: communication, football, mean, ugly, Yo mama
One day Adam and his parents were at the mall. Adams mum gave him a $5 note and sent him on his way. He got a bag of chips and a drink. He went outside and his mum and dad weren't there.
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has 50.70 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: family, food, kids, mean, money
Got said, "Let there be light!" Chuck Norris looked at him and said: "Say please."
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has 50.64 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, communication, god, mean
Q: What did I do in the bed last night. A: Your mom.
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has 49.25 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: dirty, mean, sex
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