The housewife answered a knock on the door and found a total stranger standing on the doorstep.
"Excuse me for disturbing you, ma'am," he said politely, "but I pass your house every morning on my way to work, and I've noticed that every day you appear to be hitting your son on the head with a loaf of bread."
"That's right."
"Every day you hit him on the head with a loaf of bread, and yet this morning you were beating him with a chocolate cake."
"Well, today is his birthday."
Yo mama breath stanks so bad, instead of using baking soda, it smells like she uses baking ass!
One day Adam and his parents were at the mall.
Adams mum gave him a $5 note and sent him on his way.
He got a bag of chips and a drink.
He went outside and his mum and dad weren't there.
I was walking down the street with my wife earlier when she accused me of being ashamed to be seen with her.
"That's total bollocks" I replied.
By text, from across the road.
Vote:
Q: Wanna hear a joke?
A: Women's Rights.
Oh, you play racquetball?
You must be extremely athletic.
Q: How do you piss off a man?
A: Stand on his back and piss.
Vote:
Before the 16th century, the sun really did go around the earth.
Chuck Norris just decided to change it as a prank.
Vote:
Chuck Norris doesn't daydream.
He's too busy giving other people nightmares.
Vote:
Yo mama's so stupid when she cries for help she says "come here please".
Vote: