The best memory jokes

A scientist tells a pharmacist, "Give me some prepared tablets of acetylsalicylic acid." "Do you mean aspirin?" asks the pharmacist. The scientist slaps his forehead. "That's it!" he says. "I can never remember the name."
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has 71.12 % from 70 votes. More jokes about: chemistry, geek, medical, memory, science
Two elderly people living in Trailer Estates, he was a Widower and she a widow, had known each other for a number of years. One evening there was a community supper in the big activity center. The two were at the same table, across from one another as the meal went on, he took a few admiring glances at her and finally gathered the courage to ask her, " Will you marry me?" After about six seconds of ' careful consideration' , she answered "Yes. Yes, I will. " The meal ended and, with a few more pleasant exchanges, they went to their respective places. Next morning, he was troubled. "Did she say 'yes' or did she say 'no'?" He couldn't remember. Try as he might, he just could not recall. Not even a faint memory. With trepidation, he went to the telephone and called her. First, he explained that he didn't remember as well as he used to. Then he reviewed the lovely evening past. As he gained a little more courage, he inquired, "When I asked if you would marry me, did you say 'Yes' or did you say 'No'?" He was delighted to hear her say, "Why, I said, 'Yes, yes I will' and I meant it with all my heart." Then she continued, "I am so glad that you called, because I couldn't remember who had asked me."
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has 70.43 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: memory, old people, time, wedding
I kind a feel sorry for Hitler. Looking back at some old photos of him, his friends always left him hanging when he went for a high-five.
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has 70.32 % from 223 votes. More jokes about: friendship, Hitler, memory
Man visits India and meets an old man in the town square who is renowned for his elephantine memory. He asks the old man what he had for breakfast on the same day 15 years back. "Eggs," replies the old man, the man scoffs at this saying everyone has eggs for breakfast and walks away. Ten years later he returns to India and sees the same old man on the same spot, goes to him and asks, "How?" The old man takes one look at his face and replies, "Scrambled."
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has 70.03 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: age, elephant, football, geography, memory
The most effective way to remember to buy something to your wife for St. Valentine's Day is... to forget it once!
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has 68.63 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: memory, Valentines day, wife
Yo' Mama is so old, she dreams in black and white.
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has 67.78 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: age, insulting, memory, Yo mama
President George W. Bush decides it is time to do some public relations at a local Washington DC nursing home. The President begins his "tour" down the main hallway and passes by a little old man who doesn't seem to notice him. Sensing this, President Bush backtracks to the resident and asks, "Do you know who I am?" The little old man looks up from his walker and says, "No, but if you go to the front desk, they will tell you your name."
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has 66.46 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: memory, old people, political
A crazy man jumps from the bushes and opens his coat in front of an old lady to surprise and terrify her. The granny takes a look at him and sais: "oh, dash, I´ve forgotten to buy the eggs."
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has 66.38 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: dirty, memory, old people
Patient: "Doctor, I'm starting to forget things." Doctor: "I understand." Patient: "Understand what?"
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has 65.48 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: doctor, memory
How many bankers does it take to change a light bulb? Four. One to hold the bulb, and three to try and remember the combination.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: light bulb, memory, money, work