Why do women make better soldiers?
Because they can bleed for a week and not die.
How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One...men will screw anything.
Vote:
What's the Australian Male's idea of foreplay?
"Brace yourself, Sheila."
Every man thinks he's a dream of every woman.
Sorry guys, but the dream of every woman is eating all the time and not to get fat.
When you have a man staring at a naked Playboy model, be sure that he doesn’t wonder if she knows cooking, or if she plays piano or if she has a nice personality either!
How do you know a man is really a bad dancer?
When he can still step on Dolly Parton's toes.
Q: Why was the blonde girl's belly button bruised?
A: Because blonde men are dumb too.
A man bought a new car.
Next day he is driving his car to office.
On the way he was waiting for the Signal.
Suddenly he opened the door and got down.
Then he went to the Traffic Police and asked him, "How much should I pay to turn right?"
The Policeman was astonished and asked, "Why are you asking like this?"
Then man showed him the sign board which was in the corner of the road: "Free Left Turn"
Two young men who had just graduated from university climbed into a taxi wearing their graduation gowns.
"Are you graduates from the city university?" asked the cab driver.
"Yes, sir," they announced proudly. "Class of "99."
The cabbie extended his hand. "Class of "67."
Vote:
What do you have when you have two little balls in your hand?
A man's undivided attention.