This man was talking to a group of men at a bar and he said, "In my house I am the boss, I say when the laundry is done and when the cooking is made and when the dishes are washed." One of the guys at the table said, "How long have you been married?" The man says, "Oh I'm not married I'm single!"
A woman went shopping. She walks to checkout counter and then the salesman packs all her groceries: milk, cheese, orange juice, half of bread, bar of soap, toothpaste... All of a sudden the salesman asks her: "You're single, aren't you?" A bit surprised woman smiles and answers: "That's right, but how did you guessed that?" "Because you're so ugly."
What do a clitoris, an anniversary, and a toilet have in common? Men always miss them.
Q: What was the first word out of Adam's mouth when he first saw Eve? A: Whoa man! Thus, the word "woman" was created.
Q: Why are Christmas trees better than Men? A: Even the small ones give satisfaction.
Men are like.....Bank Machines. Once they withdraw they lose interest.
What's the difference between Big Foot and an intelligent man? Big Foot's been spotted several times.
Dad: Hey son want to hear a joke? Son: Yeah! Dad: Pussy. Son: I don't get it. Dad: Exactly...
I only wanted to have a child, not marry one.
Q: What do you call a man who has lost 98% of his brain? A: A widower.