A small boy goes up to a man in the street and asks him if he’s lost £5. The man checks his pockets and says, ‘Well, yes. I think I have lost a £5 note. Have you found one?’ The boy replies, ‘No. I just wanted to see how many people had lost a £5 note today. You make 72.’
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" And the father replied, "I don't know, son, I'm still paying for it."
Chuck Norris can pick "side" when flipping a coin.
Why don't cows ever have any money? Because the farmers milk them dry.
What did the rabbit bride get on her wedding day? A forty-carrot wedding ring.
Chuck Norris doesn't have an ATM PIN – the machine just spits out cash – at every bank!
Did you hear about the man who received a tip on a horse called Cigarette? He didn't have enough money tabaccer!
Q: What kind of money do elves use? A: Jingle bills!
A doctor is talking to a car mechanic, "Your fee is several times more per hour then we get paid for medical care." "Yeah, but you see, doc, you have always the same model, it hasn't changed since Adam; but we have to keep up to date with new models coming every month."
Q: What do you call a group financial controller who's lost his job? A: Bob.