The best money jokes

Two guys were in a bar, and they were both watching the television when the news came on. It showed a guy on a bridge who was about to jump, obviously suicidal. "I'll bet you $10 he'll jump," said the first guy. "Bet you $10 he won't," said the second guy. Then, the guy on the television closed his eyes and threw himself off the bridge. The second guy hands the first guy the money. "I can't take your money," said the first guy. "I cheated you. The same story was on the five o'clock news." "No, no. Take it," said the second guy. "I saw the five o'clock news too. I just didn't think the guy was dumb enough to jump again!"
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has 60.56 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, money, technology
The below are valid reasons as to why drinking should be allowed at work. If you use them wisely, you may even be able to convince your boss to allow alcohol. 1. It's an incentive to show up. 2. It reduces stress. 3. It leads to more honest communications. 4. It reduces complaints about low pay. 5. It cuts down on time off because you can work with a hangover. 6. Employees tell management what they think, not what management wants to hear. 7. It helps save on heating costs in the winter. 8. It encourages carpooling. 9. Increases job satisfaction because if you have a bad job you don't care. 10. It eliminates vacations because people would rather come to work. 11. It makes fellow employees look better. 12. It makes the cafeteria food taste better. 13. Bosses are more likely to hand out raises when they are wasted. 14. Salary negotiations are a lot more profitable.
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has 60.22 % from 81 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, holiday, money, winter, work
Yo' Mama is so poor, she only goes to the grocery store for free samples.
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has 60.16 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: money, Yo mama
Yo' Mama is so poor, she goes to Kentucky Fried Chicken to lick other people's fingers.
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has 60.16 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: food, insulting, money, Yo mama
Yo' Mama is so poor, she does a drive-by from the bus.
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has 60.16 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: money, Yo mama
Yo' Mama is so skanky, when the waiter brought out her strip steak, she asked where to tuck the dollar bills.
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has 60.16 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: food, money, Yo mama
Yo' Mama is so poor, she considers the give-a-penny/take-a-penny cups part of her own "Save Yo' Mama" foundation.
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has 60.16 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: money, Yo mama
If I won the Lottery, I wouldn’t be one of those people who immediately quit their jobs. I’d make my boss’s life a living hell for a week or two first.
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has 60.15 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: money
Misers are lousy to live with, but they make great ancestors.
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has 60.15 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: money
Money spoils people, thus folks of Sierra Leone are really good.
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has 60.15 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: money
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