The best money jokes

What do you get if you cross a sorceress with a millionaire? A very witch person.
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Why is money called dough? Because we all knead it.
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Where do fish keep their money? In a river bank!
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My grandfather came from a very poor family. The only time he tasted meat was when he bit his tongue.
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We were so poor we couldn’t get rid of the roaches in our house because they paid half the rent.
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A business man called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed a visa. "Oh no I don't, I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked, and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express."
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Johnny collected lots of money from trick or treating and he went to the candy store to buy some chocolate. ' You should give that money to charity,' said the shopkeeper. 'No, I'll buy the chocolate. You give the money to charity!'
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Why did the mean teacher walk around with her purse open? She'd read there was going to be some change in the weather.
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If you owe the bank $100, that's your problem. If you owe the bank $100 million, that's the bank's problem.
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Why do people like to borrow money in Alaska? Because they have Fairbanks!
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