Mary held her little daughter, twenty minutes under water. Not to care for any troubles, just to look at those funny bubbles.
How do you make a dead baby float? Take your foot off of it’s head.
What's worse than finding a dead baby on your pillow in the morning? Realizing you were drunk and made love to it the night before.
Chuck Norris was hungry so he went to eat a hotdog. When he saw it giggled and said: "What a bad luck! Look what a part of a dog I've to eat!"
Q: How do Asians name their babies? A: They throw a can down the stairs.
Why do cannibals make suitcases out of people's heads? Because they're headcases.
Q: Where does a black jew go? A: The back of the oven.
Chuck Norris never has to wax his skis because they're always slick with blood.
Q: What do you have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? A: Not enough sand.
Q: What did the baby say as I threw it in the blender? A: I didn't catch it, I was too busy masturbating.