The best phone jokes

A lawyer has just settled down in his new office. So now, he is thinking what he can do to have clients. After a long time thinking, a man comes into the office. Right away, the lawyer decides to make his new plan take action. So he picks up the phone and says: "Unfortunately, Ms. Onassis, I cannot undertake your case right now. I am working full time, call me in a month to see if I can help you." He puts the phone down and says to the waiting man: "How can I help you sir?" "Nothing really, I am from telephone communications, I just came to connect your phone."
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has 76.46 % from 82 votes. More jokes about: communication, lawyer, office, phone, work
My iPhone fell from the 20th floor. Good thing it was in airplane mode.
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has 76.06 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: phone, technology
I sent a reminder to a client that it was time to visit the eye doctor. He called back to inform me that he would not be coming in because, as he put it, "I have a new obstetrician."
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has 75.97 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: customer service, doctor, phone, time
Your momma so fat when she step on the scales her phone number came up.
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has 75.63 % from 539 votes. More jokes about: fat, phone, Yo mama
Calling for information about one of my credit cards, I got the following recorded prompt: "Please enter your account number as it appears on your card or statement." I did as instructed, and the system said, "Please enter your five-digit ZIP code." After I put that in, I got a third message: "If you would like your information in English, press one."
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has 75.38 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service, phone
If you drop your phone in water, put it in a bowl of rice. Overnight an Asian will come to your house, fix the phone, eat the rice and then run away.
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has 74.88 % from 356 votes. More jokes about: asian, phone, technology
Phones are getting thinner and smarter. People, not so much.
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has 74.78 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: fat, phone, stupid, technology
What has two wings and a halo? A Chinese telephone. Wing, Wing, Halo
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has 74.32 % from 199 votes. More jokes about: phone, racist
Yo mamma so stupid she tried to eat her iPhone because it had an apple on it!
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has 74.14 % from 219 votes. More jokes about: phone, stupid, Yo mama
One day a man goes to a pet shop to buy a parrot. The assistant takes the man to the parrot section and asks the man to choose one. The man asks, "How much is the yellow one?" The assistant says, "$2000." The man is shocked and asks the assistant why it's so expensive. The assistant explains, "This parrot is a very special one. He knows typewriting and can type really fast." "What about the green one?" the man asks. The assistant says, "He costs $5000 because he knows typewriting and can answer incoming telephone calls and takes notes." "What about the red one?" the man asks. The assistant says, "That one's $10,000." The man says, "What does HE do?" The assistant says, "I don't know, but the other two call him boss."
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has 74.00 % from 123 votes. More jokes about: animal, money, parrot, phone
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