The best phone jokes

Chuck Norris can text using a rotary phone.
Vote: has 72.63 % from 29 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone
Phones are getting thinner and smarter. People, not so much.
Vote: has 72.56 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fat, phone, stupid, technology
Chuck Norris put his phone on air-plane mode and flew it.
Vote: has 72.27 % from 47 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: airplane, Chuck Norris, phone, travel
What do you call a Scottish iPhone? An AyePhone.
Vote: has 71.63 % from 37 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT, phone
While I was out to lunch, my coworker answered my phone and told the caller that I would be back in 20 minutes. The woman asked, "Is that 20 minutes Central Standard Time?"
Vote: has 71.52 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: customer service, food, phone, time, work
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead team were sent out to install telephone poles for the Telephone Company. After the first day, the brunette team had installed 30 poles, the redhead team had installed 37 poles, and the blonde team had installed 7. The contractor was outraged with the blonde team and demanded to know why they had done so few. "Hey, we saw what the other teams were doing. Their's were still sticking out of the ground."
Vote: has 71.43 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, ginger, phone
Chuck Norris puts phone companies on hold.
Vote: has 71.43 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone
Chuck Norris can answer a missed call.
Vote: has 71.35 % from 41 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone
H - "Hello?" W - "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?" H - "Yes." W - "Great! I am at the mall two blocks from where you are. I just saw a beautiful mink coat. It's absolutely gorgeous!! Can I buy it?" H - "What's the price?" W - "Only $1,500.00." H - "Well, OK, go ahead and get it, if you like it that much..." W - "Ahhh, and I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the 2001 models. I saw one I really liked. I spoke with the salesman, and he gave me a really good price...and since we need to exchange the BMW that we bought last year..." H-"What price did he quote you?" W - "Only $60,000..." H - "OK, but for that price I want it with all the options." W - "Great! But before we hang up, something else..." H - "What?" W - "It might look like a lot, but I was reconciling your bank account and...I stopped by the real estate agent this morning and saw the house we had looked at last year. It's on sale!! Remember? The one with a pool, English Garden, acre of park area, beachfront property." H - "How much are they asking?" W - "Only $450,000 - a magnificent price...and I see that we have that much in the bank to cover..." H - "Well, then go ahead and buy it, but just bid $420,000. OK?" W - "OK, sweetie...Thanks! I'll see you later!! I love you!!!" H - "Bye...I love u too..." The man hangs up, closes the phone's flap, and raises his hand while holding the phone and asks to all those present: "Does anyone know who this phone belongs to?"
Vote: has 71.28 % from 1435 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, marriage, money, phone
Chuck Norris' phone never auto corrects him.
Vote: has 71.25 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone