The best pirate jokes

How did Captain Hook die? He wiped his bum with the wrong hand!
has 66.38 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: death, disgusting, pirate
Q: How do pirates make their money? A: By hook or by crook!
has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: money, pirate
Chuck Norris once shook a pirates hand. That pirate is now known as Captain Hook
has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, pirate
Q: What do pirates wear in the winter? A: Long Johns!
has 63.17 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: pirate, winter
Q: Who was the most famous pirate octopus? A: Captain Squid.
has 59.19 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal, pirate
A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's wheel on his penis. The bartender says to him, "You know you've got a ship's wheel on your penis?" And the pirate says, "Argh, I know. It drives me nuts."
has 57.03 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: bar, dirty, pirate
Q: Where do pirates buy their parrot food? A: Petsmarrrrrrrrt!
has 55.71 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: food, parrot, pirate
Yo' Mama is so flat, pirates can't wait to get their hands her a sunken chest.
has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: pirate, Yo mama
Q: Why are black people, pirates? A: Because they go nigarrr.
has 31.68 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: black people, pirate, racist
A pirate walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender walks over to him and says "Hey, I couldn't help but notice when you walked in. Is that a steering wheel hung between your legs?" "Aye!" replied the pirate, "And it's drivin' me nuts!"
has 26.16 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, pirate
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