The best school jokes

One day,little Timmy was at school and heard the word “shit”. He went home and asked his dad for the definition and he promptly told him “coats and jackets”. Timmy went to school the next day and heard the word “fucking”, and for a second time, asked his father what it meant. His father promptly said “cooking”. Then,he returned to school the third day and heard the words “bitches and hoes”. He went home and his father told him it meant “grandpa and grandma”. Later,on Thanksgiving night,his grandparents came over. Timmy answered the door with glee and says: “Hey bitches and hoes! I’ll take your shit to the closet cause dad’s in the kitchen fucking the turkey!"
Vote: has 83.71 % from 1216 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: food, kids, school, Thanksgiving
When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay: "What is courage?" He received an A+ for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.
Vote: has 83.61 % from 1357 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, school, teacher
Teacher: "I killed a person, tell me this sentence in future tense." Student: "In future tense, You will go to jail."
Vote: has 83.51 % from 408 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: school
Teacher: Why are you late? Ramu: Because of the sign. Teacher: What sign? Ramu: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
Vote: has 83.40 % from 906 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: school, teacher
Father to son after exam: "Let me see your report card." Son: "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."
Vote: has 83.28 % from 222 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: school
Little Johnny asks the teacher, "Mrs Roberts, can I be punished for something I haven't done?" Mrs Roberts is shocked, "Of course not, Johnny, that would be very unfair!" Little Johnny is relieved, "OK Mrs Roberts, sorry, I haven't done my homework."
Vote: has 83.13 % from 186 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: little Johnny, school, teacher
Mom: What did you do at school today? Mark: We did a guessing game. Mom: But I thought you were having a math exam. Mark: That’s right!
Vote: has 82.79 % from 307 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: school
Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room. The teacher says, "Why are you arguing?" One boy answers, "We found a ten dollor bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie." "You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher, "When I was your age I didn't even know what a lie was." The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.
Vote: has 82.69 % from 899 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, money, school, teacher
Billy, learned at school that everybody has secrets. So, he decided to take advantage of it. One day, as he came home from school, he went in front of his mother and told her: "Mommy, mommy! I know everything!" His mom, obviously scared to death: "Here, take a 100 euros and say NOTHING to your father about it, okay?" "Okay mommy!" says Billy and leaves the room with a big smile on his face. When his dad came from work, he did the same to him as well: "Daddy, daddy! I found out everything!" Numb, his father puts his hand on his pocket: "Here, take a 100 euros and say NOTHING to your mother, okay?" "Okay!" says Billy with a bigger smile on his face. The next morning, on his way to school, he sees the Postman. He thought he could try it to him too: "Mr. Focker, I know everything!" The Postman, the minute he heard it, fell on his knees and wide opened his arms: "Then, come... Come closer... My son!"
Vote: has 82.49 % from 105 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dad, death, kids, money, school
Mother, "How was school today, Patrick?" Patrick, "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!" Mother, "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?" Patrick, "What school?"
Vote: has 82.47 % from 91 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, family, school


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