The best school jokes

Teacher: Why are you late? Ramu: Because of the sign. Teacher: What sign? Ramu: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
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has 82.52 % from 963 votes. More jokes about: school, teacher
Billy, learned at school that everybody has secrets. So, he decided to take advantage of it. One day, as he came home from school, he went in front of his mother and told her: "Mommy, mommy! I know everything!" His mom, obviously scared to death: "Here, take a 100 euros and say NOTHING to your father about it, okay?" "Okay mommy!" says Billy and leaves the room with a big smile on his face. When his dad came from work, he did the same to him as well: "Daddy, daddy! I found out everything!" Numb, his father puts his hand on his pocket: "Here, take a 100 euros and say NOTHING to your mother, okay?" "Okay!" says Billy with a bigger smile on his face. The next morning, on his way to school, he sees the Postman. He thought he could try it to him too: "Mr. Focker, I know everything!" The Postman, the minute he heard it, fell on his knees and wide opened his arms: "Then, come... Come closer... My son!"
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has 82.48 % from 139 votes. More jokes about: dad, death, kids, money, school
A lonely frog telephoned the Psychic Hotline and asked what his future holds. His Personal Psychic Advisor tells him: "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you." The frog is thrilled, "This is great! "Will I meet her at a party?" he croaks. "No," says the psychic, "in biology class."
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has 82.28 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: animal, beauty, phone, school, science
Boy: “Isn’t the principal a dummy!” Girl: “Say, do you know who I am?” Boy: “No.” Girl: “I’m the principal’s daughter.” Boy: “And do you know who I am?” Girl: “No,” Boy: “Thank goodness!”
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has 82.26 % from 557 votes. More jokes about: school
Teacher and her 3 boy students: Teacher: “Why did you laugh?” Boy 1: “I saw a strap of your bra.” Teacher: “You are punished to stay out of school for one week.” Boy 2 laughed… Teacher: “Why did you laugh?” Boy 2: “I saw your bra straps.” Teacher: “You are punished to stay out of school for one month.” Teacher bent down to pickup a chalk. Boy 3 started walking out of the class… Teacher: “Why are you leaving?” Boy 3: “I think my school days are over.”
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has 82.10 % from 582 votes. More jokes about: dirty, school, student, teacher
English Class Teacher: "One day we will be corruption free. Which tense is it?" Student: "Future impossible tense."
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has 82.08 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: communication, money, school, student, teacher
Teacher: Can anyone give me a sentence with a direct object? Student: You are pretty. Teacher: What’s the direct object? Student: A good report card.
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has 82.06 % from 399 votes. More jokes about: school
Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room. The teacher says, "Why are you arguing?" One boy answers, "We found a ten dollor bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie." "You should be ashamed of yourselves," said the teacher, "When I was your age I didn't even know what a lie was." The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.
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has 82.06 % from 944 votes. More jokes about: age, money, school, teacher
Teacher: What is the chemical formula for water? Ramu: "HIJKLMNO"!! Teacher: What are you talking about? Ramu: Yesterday you said it's H to O!
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has 82.01 % from 410 votes. More jokes about: school, science
"Dad, I don't want to go to school today." said the boy. "Why not, son?" "Well, one of the chickens on the school farm died last week and we had chicken soup for lunch the next day. Then three days ago one of the pigs died and we had roast pork the next day." "But why don't you want to go today?" "Because our English teacher died yesterday!"
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has 81.99 % from 656 votes. More jokes about: dad, death, school, teacher
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