The best sex jokes

Two old ladies were outside smoking one day when it started to rain. One of the ladies took out a condom, cut off the tip, and put it over her cigarette. The other lady said, 'Hey, that's a good idea. What's that called?' The lady responded, 'It's a condom.' The other lady said, 'Where can you get one of those?' She said, 'Oh, just about any grocery of drug store.' So, the next day, the lady went to a local drug store, went up to the cashier, and said, 'I need to get some condoms.' The cashier looked at her puzzled (because of her age) and said, 'UH, what size?' The lady responded, 'Hmm, one that would fit a camel.'
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has 73.11 % from 396 votes. More jokes about: animal, drug, sex
Programming is like sex. One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
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has 73.04 % from 375 votes. More jokes about: IT, life, programmer, sex
If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to do it?
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has 73.01 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: sex
A man calls 911 emergency: " Come immediately, my little son has swallowed a condom!" After five minutes, the same man calls back: "It is ok, I found another one."
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has 72.98 % from 197 votes. More jokes about: dirty, mean, phone, sex, time
What does a Blonde say after multiple orgasms? Way to go team!
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has 72.93 % from 172 votes. More jokes about: sex
The four words most hated by men during sex? ‘Is it in yet?’
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has 72.93 % from 703 votes. More jokes about: sex
An old lady went to visit her dentist. When it was her turn she sat in the chair, lowered her underpants and raised her legs. The dentist said: "Excuse me; I 'm not a gynecologist." "I know," said the old lady "I want you to take my husband's teeth out."
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has 72.91 % from 122 votes. More jokes about: dentist, dirty, husband, old people, sex
A Koala and a Prostitiute had just finished having sex, so the Prostitute said, " All right, now give me my money!" The Koala replied, " Money, what for?" " What for?", the Prostitute growled, "Look up Prostitute in the dictionary and read what it says." So the Koala looked up prostitute in the dictionary. It said, "Prostitute- A woman who is paid to have sex." " Okay," said the Koala, " now you look up Koala in the dictionary, and read what it says." So the Prostitute looked up Koala in the dictionary. It said, "Koala- A furry animal who eats bush, then leaves."
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has 72.87 % from 281 votes. More jokes about: animal, money, sex
Man to friend: ‘I read a survey that said half the men in the UK masturbate in the shower, and the other half sing. Do you know what they sing?’ Friend: ‘No I don’t.’ Man: ‘I thought you wouldn’t.’
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has 72.83 % from 368 votes. More jokes about: sex
Q: What's the difference between driving in the fog and eating pussy? A: At least when you are eating pussy you can see the asshole in front of you.
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has 72.82 % from 431 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, sex
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