The best sex jokes

I walked in on my girlfriend having sex with her fitness trainer. Me: "Okay, this isn't working out."
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has 72.22 % from 127 votes. More jokes about: love, sex, sport
Q: What does it mean if you were born in September? A: That your parents started the new year with a bang!
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has 72.08 % from 110 votes. More jokes about: birthday, dirty, new year, sex, time
A man and his wife went to the pharmacy to pick up his prescription for Viagra. Seeing the $10 per pill price his wife was astonished - but then realized "it's only going to cost us $30 per year."
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has 72.05 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: marriage, medical, money, sex, viagra
"Is it rape if it's your wife?" "I don't think so." "What a relief! I thought you'd be mad as hell!"
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has 72.03 % from 849 votes. More jokes about: sex, wife
‘Its been a rough day. I put on a shirt and a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase and the handle came off. I’m afraid to go to the bathroom.’ Rodney Dangerfield
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has 71.95 % from 337 votes. More jokes about: sex
A husband and wife decide they need to spice up their sex life. The wife buys a pair of crotchless underwear, puts them on, and goes into the bedroom. She seductively asks her husband, "Hey Big Boy, do ya want some of this?" The husband takes one look at her underwear and replies, "Hell no! Look what that thing does to underwear!"
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has 71.82 % from 157 votes. More jokes about: sex
The biggest difference between men and women is what comes to mind when the word 'Facial' is used.
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has 71.80 % from 129 votes. More jokes about: sex
A little boy asked his mother: Mummy, why are you white and I am black? Don’t even ask me that, when I remember that party..., you are lucky that you don’t bark.
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has 71.79 % from 588 votes. More jokes about: sex
On a senior citizens bus tour, while the passengers were unloading to do some sightseeing, one elderly lady stopped and whispered in the driver's ear. She said, "Driver, I believe that I was sexually harassed!" The driver didn't think much of her complaint, but promised he would check into it soon. Later, that same day, as the passengers were unloading again, a second little old lady bent down and whispered in his ear, "Sir, I believe I was sexually harassed!" This time, he figured he'd better look into it. A few passengers had remained on the bus, and he decided to go back and question them, to find out if they knew what was going on. He found one little old man crawling along the bus floor beneath the seats and stooped down to question him. "Excuse me sir, could I help you?" The elderly man looked up and said, "Well, sonny you sure can. I've lost my toupee and I'm trying to find it..." The man continued, "I thought I'd located it twice, but they were parted in the middle, and mine is parted on the side!"
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has 71.74 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: age, disgusting, old people, sex, travel
A French monk wrote a manifesto stating that every woman would agree to sell her body for money. The manifesto was read by the Queen of France and she invited the monk for a chat. So, you're stating that every women would agree to sell herself? Yes. Me too? Of course. And how much do you think I would cost? 500 francs. What?! Only 500 francs?! Here you go - you've already started to negotiate.
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has 71.65 % from 230 votes. More jokes about: sex
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