The best sex jokes

If your born in September, its pretty safe to assume your parents started out the New Year with a Bang!
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More jokes about: birthday, kids, new year, sex
Man walks over to a lady in a bar and asks "whats your name ?" "Carmen" she replies,... "I like cars and men ! Whats yours ?" The man looks her up and down and sayes "Beerpussy ..."
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More jokes about: bar, beer, car, men, sex
An old couple returning from florida cross the border. The customs agent ask the man "did you buy anything while in the US. the man answers no. the man's wife asks her husband "what did he say?". the man tells his wife "the agent wants to know if we bought anything". the customs agent asks the man where he is from. the man answers "toronto". the man's wife says "what did he say?" the man tells his wife "he wanted to know where we were from. the agent says to the man " i was in toronto once, i had the worst sex ever in my life in toronto." the man's wife says "what did he say?" the husband tells his wife "he thinks he knows you dear."
Vote: has 67.69 % from 136 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: husband, sex, travel, wife
Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?" Woman: "Unfertilized."
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More jokes about: food, men, sex, women
If your right leg was Halloween and the other one was Christmas I would have come visit you between the holidays.
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More jokes about: Christmas, dirty, flirt, Halloween, sex
An elderly man and woman meet in a bar and get to talking. They are enjoying their conversation so much that, when the bar closes, they decide to continue at the woman's apartment. After a time, things start getting pretty romantic and they wind up in bed. Afterward, they're both laying there, staring at the ceiling. The old man is thinking, “Gosh, if I had known she was a virgin, I would have been more careful with her.” The old lady is thinking, “Geez, if I had known he could get it up, I would have taken off my panties.”
Vote: has 67.64 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: bar, dirty, old people, romantic, sex
A white guy walks into a bar and asked a black guy for a bl*w job. The black guy beat him up and threw him out of the bar. The bartender then asked, "What did he say to you? The black guy responded I don't know all I heard is something about a job!!
Vote: has 67.55 % from 441 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: bar, bartender, black people, sex, work
The wife is back on the warpath again. I suggested that we make a little sex tape ... she was up for it ... until I suggested holding auditions. I just don’t understand why she is so mad!
Vote: has 67.36 % from 114 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Q: "What is the difference between like and love?" A: "Spit and swallow."
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More jokes about: dirty, love, sex
What are the small bumps around women’s nipples? It’s Braille for ‘suck here’.
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More jokes about: sex