Kids in the back seat cause accidents; accidents in the back seat cause kids.
What’s a man’s ultimate embarrassment? Walking into a wall with an erection and hurting his nose.
Have you heard about the new "Mint flavored birth control pill" for women that they take immediately before sex? They're called "Predickamints".
Advice for office managers: Keep the sexual harassment complaint forms in the bottom drawer. That way, when she goes to get one you'll get a great view of her arse.
Apparently 98% of black people enjoy sex in the shower. The other 2% have never been to prison.
If your right leg was Halloween and the other one was Christmas I would have come visit you between the holidays.
The teacher asked Johnny, "What is sex?" Johnny stood up and said: "Sex is a temptation caused my a sensation where a boy sticks his location into a girls destination to increase the population of the next generation" The teacher stared at him and fainted.
Q: What is the difference between frustration and satisfaction? A: What the Fuck! and What a Fuck!
A furniture store keeps calling me. But all I wanted was one night stand.
A man and wife were making love. When thay saw there 8 year old son at the door crying the dad started laughing and the boy ran away. Mom said "You better fix this now." The dad couldn't find the boy anywhere unwell he hurd a loud noise conning from grandma's room so he opened up the door and there was the boy putting his "wood" to grandma. The dad screamed "What the fuck." The boy said "It aims so funny when it's your mom is it."