The best sex jokes

Condoms are not completely safe. A friend of mine was wearing one and he got hit by a bus.
Vote: has 68.61 % from 341 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
The teacher asked Johnny, "What is sex?" Johnny stood up and said: "Sex is a temptation caused my a sensation where a boy sticks his location into a girls destination to increase the population of the next generation" The teacher stared at him and fainted.
Vote: has 68.60 % from 41 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, little Johnny, sex, teacher
If your right leg was Halloween and the other one was Christmas I would have come visit you between the holidays.
Vote: has 68.56 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Christmas, dirty, flirt, Halloween, sex
A teacher was asking his pupils to tell the name of body organs. When he asked the name of buttocks when pointing the picture of it, one of the pupils answered: "Its name is trouble". When the teacher asked the boy about the reason, the boy replied: "I myself saw my father last night rubbing my mother's ass saying 'what a trouble it is.'"
Vote: has 68.45 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: communication, dirty, kids, sex, teacher
Your best friend has three girlfriends. Their names are Doe, Ray, and Me. All 3 want to do something special so they set up some dates. Three days ago Doe kisses him. Two days ago Ray gives him vaginal sex. Yesterday, who sucks his dick?
Vote: has 68.29 % from 1353 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dating, sex
Two attorneys were walking out of a bar and a beautiful young lady walks by. One attorney turns to his associate and comments "Boy, I would like to fuck her! The other attorney thinks for a second and said "Out of what"?
Vote: has 68.26 % from 52 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: bar, lawyer, sex
Rudolph the well hung reindeer, Had a great enormous cock, All he could ever do with it, was beat it off inside a sock, All of the female reindeer, Had pussies that were just too small, Poor old well hung Rudolph, Could not get any sex at all, Then one horny Christmas eve, Santa came to say, "Rudolph with your cock so strong... Fuck my arsehole all night long!" Then all the reindeer loved him, A few of them were heard to say, "Rudolph the well hung reindeer... You're so lucky Santa's gay"
Vote: has 68.24 % from 142 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, Christmas, dirty, gay, sex
I wish my girlfriend had warned me about the ceiling mirror in her bedroom. I lay down ready for her, then ran out screaming – I’d looked up and thought I was being attacked by a naked skydiver.
Vote: has 68.17 % from 110 votes. Send joke:

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I had a visitor one night… he explored my body… licked, sucked, swallowed & had his fill… when satisfied he left… I was hurt… Damn mosquito!!!
Vote: has 68.14 % from 74 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, dirty, sex
A lady tells her husband, “My gynecologist said I can’t have sex for two weeks.” He replies, “What did your dentist say?”
Vote: has 68.14 % from 74 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex