The best sex jokes

The chicken and the egg are laying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face while the egg is frowning and looking slightly annoyed. The egg mutters "Well I guess that answers that riddle".
Vote: has 50.71 % from 102 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
A wife catches her husband masturbating under the shower and approaches him. The husband: Oh dear, it was so dirty that I had to rub it so hard... it almost hurts!
Vote: has 50.58 % from 84 votes. Send joke:

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My girlfriend always laughs during sex – no matter what she’s reading.
Vote: has 50.40 % from 50 votes. Send joke:

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Question: Why do women close their eyes during sex? Answer: They can’t stand seeing a man have a good time.
Vote: has 50.29 % from 29 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex, time, women
What do you call the useless piece of skin on a penis? The man.
Vote: has 50.25 % from 230 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men, sex
Life is a sexually transmitted disease.
Vote: has 50.17 % from 52 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Good: Your daughter has got a new job. Bad: As a call girl. Ugly: Your co-workers are her best clients. Very ugly: She makes more money than you.
Vote: has 50.16 % from 61 votes. Send joke:

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How did Pinocchio find out he was made of wood? When his hand caught fire.
Vote: has 50.15 % from 81 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Are you a mum? I am not a dad! Maybe you could help me with that!
Vote: has 49.93 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: family, flirt, sex
Small boy to friend: ‘What would you do if a girl kissed you?’ Friend: ‘I’d kiss her back. What would you do?’ Small boy: ‘I’d kiss her front.’
Vote: has 49.80 % from 76 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex