How can you get AIDS from a toilet seat?
By sitting down before the last guy gets up.
If your right leg was Halloween and the other one was Christmas I would have come visit you between the holidays.
Man walks over to a lady in a bar and asks "whats your name ?"
"Carmen" she replies,... "I like cars and men ! Whats yours ?"
The man looks her up and down and sayes "Beerpussy ..."
Q: How do you know a blonde just lost her virginity?
A: The crayons are still sticky.
Vote:
"Will you marry me?" Is a marriage proposal.
"Will, You, Mary, Me" is a foursome proposal.
"Grandma, in the greengrocery they have that thick and that long cucumber."
Deaf grandma answers,"be sure he'll also marry you."
Got my wife a dildo and some shoes for her birthday.
If she doesn't like the shoes, she can go fuck herself.
Sex is hereditary. If your parents never had it, chances are you won't either.
I've accepted every email offer I've ever received.
My penis is now 235 feet long.
Vote:
Q: Why do schools in West Virginia only have Drivers Ed two days a week?
A: Because they need their cars for Sex Ed the other three days a week!