What's a man's definition of a romantic evening? Sex.
Q: What do Blondes say after sex? A1: Thanks Guys. A2: Are you boys all in the same band? A3: Do you guys all play for the Green Bay Packers?
Q: Why do black women lose their hair at an early age? A: From all of the hair pulling during rape.
- "Didn't you read Lord of the Rings in high school"? - "No, I had sex in high school."
Lifting weights have really helped me with the ladies - the last five I raped didn't stand a chance.
Bigamy is having one wife too many, but so is monogamy.
Grandmother is so stupid, she’s gone on the pill because she doesn’t want any more grandchildren.
What's worse than finding a dead baby on your pillow in the morning? Realizing you were drunk and made love to it the night before.
Q. What's the definition of a Yankee? A. Same thing as a ''quickie'', only you do it yourself.
Happy Father's Day to someome who's been completely replaced in his marriage by Fifty Shades of Grey.