Smoke a smoke Not a butt Fuck a virgin Not a slut.
What happened when the blonde tried to give her boyfriend a blow-job while he was driving? They both fell off the motorcycle.
A man came up with a new invention, a vibrating tampon. That way a woman can be at her best when she is at her worst.
Q: What do you call a ninety year old man who can still masturbate? A: Miracle Whip.
Yo mama's so fat that, after sex I rolled over twice and was still on the bitch!
Roses are red lemons are sour. Open your legs and give me an hour.
What´s the difference between a goodyear and a fucking good year? 365 condoms.
On the beach, how can you recognise a guy who uses an inflatable sex doll? He doesn’t stare at the bikinis, he stares at the beach balls.
A guy buys his first motorcycle. The dealer tells him to keep a jar of Vaseline handy to rub on the chrome before it rains to prevent rusting. A few months later, the young man's girlfriend invites him to dinner at her parents' house. Before they go in, she explains their family tradition that whomever speaks first after dinner must do the dishes. After dinner, everyone sits in silence waiting for the first person to break. After 15 minutes, the young man decides to speed things up. He leans over and kisses his woman in front of her family. No one says a word. Emboldened, he throws her on the table and has sex with her. Silence. Desperate, he grabs her mother and has sex with her on the table. Suddenly, they hear thunder rumble in the distance. The guy thinks of his bike and, instinctively, pulls the jar of Vaseline out of his pocket. "OK, OK," says the father, "I'll do the dishes!"
Little Johnny, "Why are you so fat?" Little Billy, "Cause Every time I fuck ur mom she gives me a doughnut."