I used to play tennis, baseball, basketball and chess, but I stopped after my son broke my playstation.
Scene: A radio newsroom. Caller: "I just wanted to let you know you're off the air." Host: "Yes, we know. The engineers are working on it." Caller: "It would be nice if you put something on the air that says that."
Q: What's O. J. Simpson's Internet address? A: Slash, slash, backslash, slash, slash, escape.
Yo mama is so old that when she walked out of a museum the alarm went off.
In 1945 Chuck Norris drank a Redbull and jumped out a plane. For image results, Google the word Hiroshima.
I think Chuck Norris is fake cuz if he were real he'd come right now and smash my face into my keyboaraoebdbfjvjdblgoirugsvdkf
One day there were two men. One was driving a Mercedes Benz and the other was riding a horse, both waiting at the traffic light. The man in the Benz looked at the horse and noticed something different, that horse was not a normal horse. It was an electric horse and has 3 buttons in it if you press one button it moves forward, if you press the second button it moves faster and if you press the last button it will stop. The guy in the Benz was really impressed, so he asked the guy riding the horse if he wanted to trade the horse for the Benz, so he agreed. They did the trade and the guy riding the horse drove the Benz and went on his way but the other guy was still stuck in the traffic light trying to get the horse to move. He tried all the buttons but the horse does not seem to be moving so he called the horse owner and asked him if he can come back to show him how to move the horse. So the guy came back, he pressed all the buttons again but the horse still doesn't move. He noticed the horse's penis was up so he tells the other guy: "Ohh you forgot to release the handbrake!"
Chuck Norris can send an e-mail with a pencil.
Years ago Chuck Norris set up a simple little home network and gave it a name. It's called the internet.
Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off. It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Masacre.