The best travel jokes

[first day as a pilot] Control tower: What's your location? Me: I'm in the cockpit. Control tower: I mean where is the airplane? Me: Mainly behind me.
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has 67.51 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: communication, travel, work
Q: What did the valentines day card say to the stamp? A: Stick with me and you'll go places.
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has 67.34 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: communication, travel, Valentines day
Chuck Norris once climbed Mt Everest by accident.
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has 67.31 % from 100 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, travel
An aircraft is flying when all over sudden a bird crashes through the cockpit and kills both the pilot and co pilot. Having heard the crash a blonde flight attendant rushes in to find out what happened. Once inside the cockpit the plane jerks and the cabin door slams shut and can't be opened. So she pulls the captain out of his seat and sits down, taking the radio into her hands and says, "May Day! May Day! Help Me! Help Me! The pilots are dead and I don't know how to fly. Help Me! Please Help Me!" She hears a voice over the radio saying: "This is Air Traffic Control and I have you loud and clear. I will talk you through this and get you back on the ground. I've had a lot of experience with this kind of problem. Just take a deep breath. Everything will be fine! Now give me your height and position!" "I'm 5'4 and in the front seat of the plane." "O.K." says the voice on the radio. "Repeat after me: Our father who art in heaven..."
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has 66.91 % from 136 votes. More jokes about: air force, bird, blonde, stupid, travel
Yo mama's so poor, I was driving with her and she parked next to a garbage can. I asked, "What're you doing?" She said: "I'm booking us a hotel!"
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has 66.77 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: driving, money, travel, Yo mama
One day Dick Cheney, George Bush and Laura Bush were in a private jet going to France. Then, George Bush said, " If i throw this hundred dollar bill off this jet I'll make one person happy!" Then Dick Cheney said, " Man if i throw ten, ten dollar bills down, I'll make ten people happy!" Then Laura Bush said, " If I throw one hundred one dollar bills off this jet I'll make a hundred people happy." Then the pilot said, " Man, if I throw these 3 losers outta this jet, I'll make six billion people happy."
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has 66.75 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: airplane, life, political, travel
One of the two adult female friends got married and went on honeymoon to Hawaii. On return curious other girl asked her friend, “What sightseeing places did you go in Hawaii and what did you see?” The honeymoon girl explained, “For seven days, I saw only the fan on the ceiling of the room and occasionally when turned around, I saw the bed sheet too.”
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has 66.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: dirty, holiday, travel
What do you call an intelligent man in America? A tourist.
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has 66.60 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: life, travel
How did the farmer find his lost cow? He tractor down.
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has 66.60 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: animal, car, travel
Travel agency named „Bermuda triangle" – Let us meet on the other side.
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has 65.80 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: death, travel
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