Hurricane Katrina wasn't the weather... it was the wind of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick from Texas to Louisiana.
Chuck Norris can "make it rain in Southern California".
Lightening is too slow to strike Chuck Norris.
It only rains twice a year in Seattle: August through April and May through July.
There's a technical term for a sunny, warm day which follows two rainy days. It's called Monday.
It is so cold outside I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.
Yo mama's so fat that when she puts on a jumper it's known as global warming.
Q: What 80's rock band is banned from New Orleans and why? A: The Scorpions. Every time they're in town, they rock you like a hurricane.
Chuck Norris owns the gold color at the end of the rainbow.
Q. What is Snoop Dog's favorite weather? A. Drizzle