The wind is Chuck Norris breathing.
Chuck Norris can wipe rainwater from inside his car.
Chuck Norris can "make it rain in Southern California".
After Chuck Norris sweats the sweat evaporates into the sky and forms what we call lightning.
The climate requires Chuck's permission to change.
Yo momma’s so stupid, when I told her it was chilly outside she ran and got a bowl.
Chuck Norris owns the gold color at the end of the rainbow.
What are the similarities between a new wife and a tornado, there's a lot of suckin and blowin and then u lose ur house.
Q: What do the mosquito parents say to their small children, when they see people lying on the sandy beach during a hot summer day more than 15 minutes? A: "Kids, prepare the cutlery and your chin-straps. Our lunch is already heated up and ready for the consumption!"
No man can perfectly predict the weather, not even Chuck Norris. But the weather DOES try to predict what kind of day Chuck would like to have...