The best jokes about women

"Yesterday, scientists revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones. To prove their theory, the scientists fed 100 men 12 pints of beer and observed that 100% of them gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became emotional, couldn't drive, and refused to apologize when wrong. No further testing is planned."
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has 76.12 % from 120 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, beer, science, women
A lady at a party goes up to Winston Churchill and tells him, "Sir, you are drunk." Churchill replies, "Madam, you are ugly. In the morning, I shall be sober."
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has 75.90 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, mean, party, ugly, women
Q: Why is life like a penis? A: Women make it hard!
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has 75.78 % from 374 votes. More jokes about: life, sex, women
Question: What’s the best thing about a blow job? Answer: Ten minutes of silence.
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has 75.70 % from 174 votes. More jokes about: sex, time, women
Scientists have finally discovered what is wrong with the female brain. On the left side, there is nothing right, and on the right side, there is nothing left.
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has 75.68 % from 113 votes. More jokes about: women
A Rolls Royce pulls up in to an expensive restaurant. A sheik emerges, followed by a harem of women and a rooster. After ordering for himself and his harem, the sheik requests a basket of apples for the rooster. The rooster proceeds to eats three baskets of apples. The waiter asks the sheik about the voracious appetite of the rooster. The sheik explains, "A genie granted me three wishes. My first wish was to have an endless supply of money. My second wish was to have many beautiful women. And my third wish was to have an insatiable cock."
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has 75.62 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: car, food, life, money, women
Sue and Sally were discussing their sex lives. Sue said, "Mine's OK. We get it on every week, but it's no big adventure. How's yours?" Sally replied, "It's great ever since we got into S&M." Sue was surprised. "Really, Sally, I never would have guessed that you'd go for that." "Oh, sure," says Sally, "He snores while I masturbate."
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has 75.60 % from 74 votes. More jokes about: masturbation, sex, women
Big girls don't cry... They eat.
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has 75.57 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: women
I like my women how I like my laptop. Sat on my lap, turned on & completely virus free.
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has 75.45 % from 204 votes. More jokes about: computer, dirty, women
A young , attractive woman thought she might have some fun with a stiff-looking military man at a cocktail party, so she walked over and asked him, “Major, when was the last time you had sex?” “1956,” was his reply. “No wonder you look so uptight!” she exclaimed. “Major, you need to get out more!” “I’m not sure I understand you,” he answered, glancing at his watch, ”It’s only 2014 now.”
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has 75.45 % from 360 votes. More jokes about: sex, time, women
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