What is a buttress? A female goat.
Question: What’s worse than a male chauvinistic pig? Answer: A woman that doesn’t do what she’s told.
Q: Who were the first two black women? A: Aunt Jemima and Mother Fucker!
Q: Why haven't they sent any women to the moon? A: Because it doesn't need cleaning yet.
Question: If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? Answer: The dog, because he’ll shut up after you let him in.
An old woman buys herself some bright red crotchless panties and goes home to surprise her husband. When her husband comes home, she calls him into the bedroom and points to her new panties. "Hey old timer," she says, "come and get some of this!" The old man says, "Hell no, woman. It done ate a hole in your drawers!"
Girl: why am I still single? Brain: you're weird as shit. Body: and you're fat. Face: plus you're pretty ugly. Food: Don't worry babe, I'm here for you.
Question: Why do women close their eyes during sex? Answer: They can’t stand seeing a man have a good time.
He: So then, what's your sign? She: Dollar.
Women are Angels. And when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly... On a broomstick. We're flexible like that.