The best jokes about women

Women are like parking spaces, normally all the good ones are taken. So, occasionally, when no one's looking, you have to stick it in a disabled one.
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has 50.61 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: women
A beautiful woman in her thirties was passing through customs in London, when the customs official asks her what the reason for her trip to London was. Business or pleasure, he asks? Sadness and pleasure! She says to the officer! Why? Well, my 75 years old husband has just died and I came to his funeral! My condolences, says the officer! It must be a very difficult and painful time you're going through! Not really, this is my pleasure! I'm so sad because only now I found out that he was dead broke and did not leave a dime, a penny, not even a will for me!
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has 50.40 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: age, beauty, business, travel, women
Q: How do you fix a woman’s watch? A: You don’t. There is a clock on the oven.
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has 50.34 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: time, women
They say that if I don't support transgender rights I'm on the wrong side of history. At least I'm on the right side of the firing squad.
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has 50.20 % from 70 votes. More jokes about: black humor, history, mean, women
Question: If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? Answer: The dog, because he’ll shut up after you let him in.
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has 49.86 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: dog, wife, women
"Honey," said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper." "What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I haven't been shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don't feel like cooking a fancy meal!" "I know all that." "Then why did you invite a friend for supper?" "Because the poor fool's thinking about getting married."
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has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: women
How do you make a woman scream twice in the bedroom? Fuck her in the ass then wipe your dick on the curtains.
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has 49.54 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, sex, women
Women dream of world peace, a safe environment, and eliminating hunger. What do men dream of? Being stuck in an elevator with the Doublemint twins.
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has 49.51 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: men, women
The girl says to the guy; "Honest to God, tell me what you think... Can anyone love me?" "Yeah, for sure..." "And then... What are you waiting for...?"
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has 49.30 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: god, love, women
Q: You know why women haven't landed on the moon? A: Because there is no shopping centre.
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has 49.30 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: beauty, travel, women
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