The best jokes about women

Q: What do you call a 900-pound woman with a yeast infection? A: A whopper with cheese.
Vote: has 36.51 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women
Five men and one woman wash up on a desert island after a shipwreck. Before long they are all getting pretty horny so they all make a deal. Each man will marry the woman for one week at a time, at which point the next man in line will marry her and so on. All the men get sex every five weeks and the woman gets sex as often as she wants with a different man each week. The situation works wonderfully for five years. When the woman suddenly dies... The first week after wasn't too bad. The second week was geting sort of bad. The third week was getting pretty bad. The fourth week was really bad. The fifth week was horrible! By the sixth week it was unbearable... so they buried her.
Vote: has 36.51 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: desert island, disgusting, marriage, time, women
A man has 6 items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of Dial soap and a towel from the Holiday Inn. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 437. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.
Vote: has 36.09 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men, women
A man meets a gorgeous woman in a bar. They talk, they connect, and they end up leaving together. They get back to her place, and as she shows him around, he notices that her bedroom is completely packed with teddy bears. Hundreds of small bears are on a shelf all the way along the floor, medium sized ones are on a shelf a little higher, and huge bears are on the top shelf along the wall. The man is kind of surprised by the collection, especially because it’s so extensive, but he decides not to mention this to her. She turns to him…they kiss…then they rip each other’s clothes off and romp around the room all night. After an intense night of passion, as they are lying there together in the afterglow, the man rolls over and asks, smiling, “Well, how’d I do?” The woman says, “You can have any prize from the bottom shelf.”
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More jokes about: women
Prospective husband: Do you have a book called "Man, The Master of Womem"? Salesgirl: The fiction department is on the other side, sir.
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More jokes about: men, women
Question: What’s the difference between a woman with PMS and a pit bull? Answer: Lipstick.
Vote: has 35.66 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, women
A woman went to a doctor and said , doctor, I have a problem. every time I sneeze I have an orgasm. the doctor said, oh really, what have you been doing for it. The woman replied, snorting pepper.
Vote: has 35.66 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

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Why do women always fart only when they go to the bathroom? They have to blow dry—and there's nothing to shake.
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More jokes about: disgusting, fart, women
A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she had stayed by his bedside every single day. One day, when he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you stayed right here. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. You know what?" "What dear?" she asked gently, smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth. ”I think you're bad luck."
Vote: has 35.28 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: husband, women
Q: Why do women have tiny feet? A: So they can stand closer to the sink.
Vote: has 35.28 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women