Chuck Norris is why we don't need no stinking badgers.
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Chuch Norris stood next to a bear and was told he had to leave because the bear was scared.
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If Chuck Norris hosted TV series "Survivor" No one would Survive!
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On the show Man v.s Wild, when they talk about the profesionals that Bear recieves help from, they are refering to Chuck Norris.
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Cars were invented to have a faster way of fleeing from Chuck Norris.
Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris invented the car accident.
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Yo mama is so dumb she stuck a battery up her butt and said, "I got energy!"
The following is a short list of what Chuck Norris cannot do: .
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A married couple in their 60's are visited by a fairy who grants them both a wish.
"I want to travel around the world with my darling husband", says the wife
...2 tickets for a luxury cruise magically appear in her hand !
Husband says "sorry love, my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me ..."
So the fairy waves her wand and the husband becomes 92 !
Q: What's the difference between Aeroflot and the Scud Missile ?
A: Aeroflot has killed more people.
What do they call a woman who works as hard as a man?
Answer: “Lazy.”