Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
Question: How do you call a woman who always knows where her husband is? Answer: A widow.
Q: What do you call black people in a swimming pool? A: Coco puffs. Q: What do u call mexicans in the swimming pool? A: Reeces puffs reeces puffs!
Three prisoners are locked in a cell. One takes out a harmonica and says, ‘At least I can play a little music and pass the time.’ The second prisoner pull out a pack of cards and says, ‘We can play games too.’ The third man pulls out a packet of tampons. ‘Those aren’t much use,’ says the first prisoner. ‘Yes they are,’ says the third prisoner. ‘On the packet it says we can use them to swim, play tennis and ski.’
What's red and crawls up your leg? A homesick miscarriage.
Did you hear about the new contraceptive pill for men? You put it in your shoe and it makes you limp.
How far can a rabbit run into the woods? Halfway. After that she's running out of the woods.
Yo momma so nasty i had phone sex with her and she gave me an earinfection.
There are three 6th grade girls: a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. Which one has the biggest tits? The blonde....she's 18.
What is the differance between a dead baby and a VHS tape? The VHS tape don't stink when you leave it out in the sun.