Superman is faster then a speeding bullet.
Chuck Norris just runs Superman down and keeps going.
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Yo momma so fat when I crawl in her pussy I can't find my way out.
Chuck Norris was banned from the Olympics because his mere presence is considered a performance-enhancing substance.
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Yo mama so stupid, she went to a garage sale to buy a garage
Your mama so old she still owes Jesus five bucks.
A wife wanted an expensive fur coat from the executive husband to celebrate their Silver wedding anniversary.
The miser overbearing rich husband rejected the expensive but affordable demand.
He said, "You grow the hair on your chest and I will give you fur coat to cover it."
The wife was out of control with anger.
She pulls up her skirt, drops and throws her panties and pushes her hairy pubic area forward.
She said, "There! I have the hair on my chest, now buy me that damn coat!"
"That’s not your chest, that is your pussy!" husband screamed back.
"Oh yes that is my chest all right" she yelled back. "While we were dating this was your chest of hope. We got married and on our honeymoon you used to tease me it was your chest of pleasure. Then I started bearing children and it became your chest of family, and damn it. If you don’t buy me that fur coat, it is going to be the community chest of public."
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Chuck Norris can blow a tornado away.
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Q: How can you tell if a University of Tennessee football player is married?
A: There is tobacco spit on both sides of his pickup truck.
Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus birthday.
Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.
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Q: How Many White People Does it Take To Screw In a Lightbulb?
A: None, they get a nigger to do it.
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